What inspires me – why I do what I do – Part 1

Day 5 of LYL Blog Challenge asks us to  develop our so-called “elevator pitch”. UGH!

As I thought about this, I was led to the TED talk by Simon Sinek. He talks about the Golden Circle and how the “why” is so much more important than the “what”.

Simon Sinek’s TED talk

So I will reflect on this a while before I write further and

Pope Francis fights to save the planet

Today my mother shared a distressing article about the intentional burning of the rain forests in Indonesia. Similar stories fill the news every day.

As we humans continue to destroy this planet that is supposed to sustain life, none other than Pope Francis joins the battle….. calling each and every one of us to action.

Pope Francis’ commentary at the United Nations

What Is One Thing I Am Proud Of

Day Four of the LYL Blog Challenge – Scott suggests writing first thing in the morning before the distractions of the day begin.

I am very fortunate today to be sitting at the beach looking out over the ocean and observing the wildlife as I write this.DSC_8865

DSC_8849

 

DSC_8852

One of my favorite places on earth. It cleanses the soul and rejuvenates the mind like no other.

So what am I most proud of? Probably bringing my fractured family back together. Not that I can claim all the kudos for this – it took willingness and openness on the part of every single person to open their hearts and minds to new beginnings. But I was the one who set the ball rolling.

Without modern social media it probably would not have been possible.  Traveling home one day to visit my parents, I was seated on a plane next to a young twenty-something girl who was listening to her iPod. I had no idea at the time what an iPod – or an I-anything for that matter – was. Instead of feeling foolish and out-of-date because of my ignorance and retreating behind a book as is my wont, I gave my curiosity free reign and struck up a conversation with her. She happily shared photos with me and explained how this mysterious gadget worked. And so began my odyssey into the world of “I”. My husband bought me an iPod for my next birthday… there soon followed the marvelous I-Pad and then I discovered Facebook…. and curiosity again led me down an unexpected path. How fun would it be to re-connect with friends from uni or even high school? Even better – I wondered if any of my family members were on Facebook.

A feud years ago had torn the family apart as happens in so many families. I emigrated to America and created a new life in the New World, leaving that family behind. But those threads are never completely broken. The cliche about blood being thicker than water runs true. A common heritage and shared memories bind us close.

I did not immediately find any close family,,, but lo and behold, was that my cousin’s daughter out there? Could it be her, all grown up now after over 20 years? Throwing caution to the winds, I sent her a message… and nothing. And then after a few days came the response – yes, indeed. She had wanted to check with her mum first. After all, the last time we had been together was her christening so she didn’t even remember me!  Who was this stranger reaching across cyber space after years of silence? Did her mum even care anymore?  Thankfully, yes, she did – my cousin is one of the most open, big-hearted and positive people you will ever meet – and within a week we were Skyping  (another wonder of modern technology!) and catching up.It felt as if we had never been apart and yet since we last spoke we had, between the two of us, graduated from uni, got married and divorced, raised children, traveled the world, found and lost jobs, fallen ill and thankfully recovered, lost parents, and discovered we were more resilient than we believed. We also had come to realize what is really important in life and we both recognized that reaching out to each other and holding on for dear life this time was a gift.

That initial outreach led to a family reunion and unlike Humpty Dumpty  we were able to put the broken pieces back together. Our lives are enriched today in countless ways and I am so grateful to have been that catalyst.

“You don’t choose your family. They are God’s gift to you, as you are to them”.

Desmond Tutu

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/d/desmondtut112366.html#PTdXl827BhfelFC8.99

 

What Do People Thank Me For

IMG_1333

So this is Day 3 of the Scott Dinsmore Blog Challenge – and the theme of the day is what do people thank me for…….

This is a sneaky way of getting me to think about my talents and passions.

Just a couple of weeks ago a colleague at work thanked me from bringing her back from the edge of a meltdown – she was stressing about the workload and feeling unrecognized and undervalued. She didn’t see any way forward.  We talked – I listened more than anything else – and instead of walking out, she finished her day in the office and has since changed a few of her work habits to better manage her day.

Last week my mother thanked me for bringing her back together with her sister after a family feud that kept them apart for years. Their relationship seems stronger than ever as they share life’s challenges and joys together.

I am a voice of calm and reason amidst strife. I bring hope to broken relationships and the belief in a better tomorrow.

Looking forward to Fall

My husband and I like to take our vacation in late September or early October, when kids are back in school and we share the beach with only the birds and occasional fisherman. The transition to  Fall can be abrupt as we typically come home to cooler temperatures and shorter days.

I really enjoyed this article on Deepak Chopra’s website about how to gracefully and thankfully embrace the changing season.

Making the transition from Summer to Fall

What Makes Me Angry With The World

I am a beginner at this blogging lark so the writing below has yet to be fine-tuned and  the style refined. But they say just write and the art will come. So here goes.

This week on vacation, with days free of “to do” lists and no place I had to be except on the porch at the beach house we have rented for the week, I  quit making excuses about not having time/don’t know what to write/have no idea how to set up a website etc. and signed up for Scott Dinsmore’s 7 Day Start-A-Blog challenge.

Day One – set up my blog. Done!

Day Two – write my first blog about what makes me angry with the world. Why? Quote from the Live Your Legend website – “Dale Carnegie used to say that anyone could become a great public speaker if they were angry enough. And when it comes to helping people and living your legend, starting with your biggest frustrations can open up a lot of ideas as to the difference you want to make. Think of what consistently makes you mad about the world and what you wish was different.”

For those of you who do not know him, Scott Dinsmore created the Live Your Legend community. He was 33 years old and died last week in a  freak accident on Mt. Kilimanjaro. I never met Scott but was looking for articles on authenticity and living your passion and discovered his name on the internet. Then I read about the accident. So in the same moment as Scott came into my life, he departed his.

This seemed to be one of those random coincidences in life that turn out to be not so random after all.

Climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro has been on my bucket list ever since my husband and I visited Kenya for the first time in 2011.  That will need to be the subject of a future blog!  I had vowed to go back to Africa one day and also to work on becoming more physically fit – climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro seemed a good way to accomplish both goals.

Now the mountain has taken a vibrant and passionate and lovely young man in his prime. The outpouring of tributes on social media is evidence of the impact Scott has had on so many lives and his legacy will live on. But one still asks why? Imagine how much more he could have done to make this world a better place over the next 33 or 66 years of his life! There are hundreds of people with inspiring messages out there – however, what has struck me most about the tributes to Scott are the stories about his passion and childlike enthusiasm for life. That is what inspired others. Just a spark of that enthusiasm was enough to light a fire in someone else and give them the momentum to follow their dreams. And that connection was enough to get me to finally decide to take the leap of faith, quit listening to the reasons for not doing it  and just go ahead and create my blog.

But I digress. The theme of the day is “what makes me angry about the world.” That is an easy one to answer –  Cruelty. It doesn’t just make me angry though, It tears my soul apart.

Cruelty in all its forms – poachers hacking off the faces of elephants and rhinos to harvest their tusks and horns; irresponsible dog owners who beat or starve a defenseless animal;  men who abuse children, robbing them of their innocence and destroying their lives for ever; caseworkers neglecting the elderly in  their care because they no longer have anyone to stand up for them; not to mention soldiers in those areas of the world ravaged by war who rape the women and torture the men and sell off the children into slavery; the governments who show no mercy to the thousands of humans beings  fleeing this violence who just want a better life for themselves and for their children.

What turns these people into such evil? What transforms an innocent child into a cold hearted, vicious adult? Is this a cycle that cannot be broken?

The Dalai Lama said that if we could take every single child on planet Earth and have them meditate on compassion for one hour a week, we could eliminate all of the world’s violence with one generation.

Wow! Can it really be that simple? It is such a cliche but can love and compassion and empathy really be the answer?

The other thing that makes me really angry are developers who destroy this world we live in.They have absolutely no clue about the natural environment they wipe off the earth for ever – the birds who nested in the trees; the turtles who lived beside the creeks; the countless insects and mosses and fungi and wild flowers that called those forests and meadows home before they moved in with their bulldozers. They leave behind such desolation – and then “create” sterile rows of houses in cookie cutter neighborhoods with ornamental trees approved by HOAs and lawns laced with chemicals and streetlights and concrete.

This is the disaster behind our house – what used to be 20 acres of forest has been reduced to an empty wasteland.

IMG_2011

IMG_2022

 

IMG_2171

That is why the film Avatar moved me to such despair that I sobbed for hours after seeing it for the first time. How can we humans show such utter disregard for the world we live in?

Musings from the beach

DSC_8492

Easy to go with the flow when we are at the beach. How do we find that same peace when we are back home caught up in the stress of everyday life? Find time for each other. For ourselves? For life as it is meant to be lived?

The gulls accept each day as it is and make the most of what it has to offer. Instead we fret and worry. We create anxiety and chaos. We overthink and overdo. Just breathe. Why is that so hard?

Hilda’s Gift

Hilda left this earth on my first birthday. Hilda was my grandmother. Instead of celebrating his first born daughter, my father had to bury his mother. The irony of the circle of life. According to the stories I have heard she loved to write, did not tolerate fools lightly and fiercely defended what she believed in. Much of her spirit lives on in me. If she were alive in the computer driven world of today, she would be blogging about life’s ups and downs and finding grace in the small mercies of every day.

So here goes – to honor her memory and to finally give a voice to the musings that swirl around in my head. The journey of a Yorkshire girl who crossed the ocean in search of adventure, met her soulmate and finally put down roots. A Yorkshire girl who yearns for the wind over the open moors of her homeland but has fallen in love with the quiet ebb and flow of the marshes in the Low country. An “A” type personality driven to succeed and yet longing to just “be”. A woman, like all women,  who asks: “Have I lived deeply and fully? Have I loved well? Have I left a legacy of kindness? Has my life in some way brought benefit to others?” – Wayne Muller –  A Life of Being, Having and Doing Enough”